In just two days we celebrate Thanksgiving in the USA.
This year coming off of a presidential election, you may want to be aware of unresolved conflicts and left over “feels” from a disappointment or a victory. Unless your family is all on the same page, beware of hidden landmines.
All it takes is someone bringing up politics, religion or lifestyle choices: What was supposed to be a day of gratitude, becomes a day of full blown drama. It doesn’t have to be this way if you know how to lead instead of being pulled into negativity.
Here are some strategic communication skills to apply:
Set Your Intention
Decide in advance how you want to experience Thanksgiving. Ask yourself the following questions:
What emotions do I want to cultivate?
How do I want to show up for others?
What does a meaningful holiday season look like for me?
Once you’re clear, you’ll identify the red flags that tell you you’re getting off course.
Listen, Acknowledge and Redirect
Be mindful of distractions that can derail your intention. In many families, hot-button topics can fuel drama. Add past resentments, unresolved conflict, strong opinions, closed-mindedness, or too much alcohol, and you’ve got a recipe for chaos.
Here are some sample phrases to adjust to your situation. The method here is to “Listen and acknowledge” before you redirect. It goes like this:
“You make some valid points, Uncle George, but today I want to focus on how blessed we are to be together.”
“I hear you, Sis, but let’s keep today about loving and appreciating family.”
“Sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought. For me, I just want to focus on enjoying our time together today.”
No reason to dread holiday gatherings when you know how to lead.
Whether it’s the workplace or family dynamics, to change the culture you have to change the conversation.
Wishing you a peaceful, drama-free Thanksgiving!
Marlene Chism
