If you’re struggling with a relationship either at work or at home, take a look at your boundaries. Are they being respected or ignored?

Good boundaries support good relationships.

I’ve discovered there are basically three levels of boundaries.
Level 1: Loving Boundaries
Level 2: Strong Boundaries
Level 3: Rigid Boundaries

Loving Boundaries
This is when you are teaching people about your rules. It might be a child, a relative, or anyone who has been stepping out of line. This type of boundary is a conversation, coaching, a request, that if not respected leads to #2 Strong Boundaries.

Strong Boundaries
You control the consequences with strong boundaries. You care less about hurting their feelings or being misunderstood. You have already tried a loving boundary and they just didn’t get it or didn’t want to get it. If X then Y. You control Y, and they control X.

Rigid Boundaries
You manage your proximity. They get less of you, or you may even have to exclude this person from your life. In business, it’s being fired as a consequence of not respecting the strong boundary put into place.
In the end, the only reason you need boundaries is because someone isn’t respecting your values or your rules. Boundaries are wonderful tools if you use them wisely.

To your success,
Marlene Chism

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